Once You Met Them

There's gonna be one point in your life where you feel happy, free, and feel like there's nothing going to go wrong. Your days are fine, perfect, and drama-less. The only thing that makes you upset is that the bartender spelled your name wrong on your cup in Starbucks. You sleep well at night, wake-up every morning with a huge smile on your face. You might grumbling about how you hate morning classes or works, assignments, and how tired your body at night, but that's it. You got exhausted physically, but not mentally. It sounds a bit boring if it's a movie or book, but this is real life. Small things like bills to pay, things to buy, creating things and doing jobs, deciding where to go on holiday are sometimes enough to keep you challenged.

Of course, you live your life, and you're gonna enter a new social circle every now and then. Say you got new friends. When you are busy knitting friendship, a new person come around. They are just like you, somehow entering the door where you and your pals hanging out. You welcoming them. They are soon enough one of you and your friends. You talk about things. You talk about old and new movies. About how you two have a wide range of genre when it comes to music but they still hate some of your favorite musicians and you don't like some of their choices, too. You both having argument about it while listening to your favorite song together.

You two started to have a quite intense friendship. You have no idea how all this started. Even you started to forget how you met them. All you know is that you having them as a friend since forever. It could be a year or two or even longer (possibly shorter) but you know their stories. You know what kind of things they dream when they're sleeping. People think you are weird but they think you are more peculiar and stick around you most of the time. You two shares jokes nobody understand but you can laugh your head off. You can hug each other in the most casual yet soothing way that no one can ever give to you. Even your lover.

All of sudden it happens. They appear in your head in the most unexpected times. Sometimes you woke up at night because they come to your dreams in surprising way. You started to worry because you don't know what happened. You want to sit beside them doing nothing because you just craving for their existence. You want to make sure they are real, that you two breathing the same air under the same sky. You wanna talk to them even though you don't have anything to talk to. You started talking about them to people because you can't bear the enigmatic feeling raging in your chest. You want them more than you should, because you know you have them but now you want more than the portion you supposed to own.

When your brain still perplexed from all fights between your head and chest, you started to miss them in the way you never know. You don't know what moment you're longing because you have all your moments with them and they are still there with you. It's like all you wanna do is jump to their embrace and never released your arms from their skins. The moment you deflect your sight from their appearance, you started to yearn for them. You want their smile, their voice, their scent, their presence. You don't know what happen inside you. You have no idea. You want to stop this by leave them somewhere forever. You think it's the best idea because they are the reason why this happened. But the time you walked away from them, you run back to where they stand. Being away from them is killing you, being around them is torturing you. You're terrified.

Your brain then misinterpreted the extraneous brutality inside your heart as that one cliche thing: love. Of course you love them, they are your friend. Maybe one of the best you've ever had. But you don't love them in romantic way. You love them for them. Now we're talking about it, no one really know how many kind of love exist in this world or how to tell the differences. You know that you don't wanna loose them. Ever. If you two had an affair and it's not work out, you can't have what you own now. Things that you two share now, are gonna dissolve. It's never registered in your wish list. You love them, not in that way, you don't know in what way. It's frustrating.

So in one point of your life, your happy, drama-less day is gonna slipped away from your fingers because you met someone who is simultaneously beautiful, strange, terrifying, and wonderful. You will never know exactly how to love them. You never know where is this going. You never know the right way to explain it. Maybe you should never explain it at all.

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