Surrealucid




“What is this place?”
“I don’t know. But I think this is my room.”
Your eyes scanned the place, confuse. The place is pretty much looked like my room. Though now you asked, I realized that this isn’t really my room. There are two beds (I shared room with my sister, even though she is nowhere around to be seen), dressing table, desk with messy law books, and bookcase full of fictions, but this place is lots bigger. The plafond is lots higher and the walls are all white. It’s too quiet and bright.
“Why are we here? How can I be here?”
“I don’t know why are we here neither why you can be here. You just walked in.”
You sat on my sister’s bed. Your eyes stared at the ceiling before you finally looked in my eyes, still confuse.
“Is this real life?”
“I don’t know, love. But we can never really tell, can we?”
Silence is screaming so loud. You lied on my sister’s bed. Your messy, longish hair spread on her pillow.You need to cut it a bit, you know. I still wanna stare at you but I am tired myself, so I just lied on my own bed.
“You mad at me?”
“Sometimes you suck, no lie.” I laughed,”but I can’t stay mad at you for anything. You are too awesome.”
“I know.”
“See? You suck!” I threw a pillow at you.
Another silence. I started to wonder where are we really. The more I pay attention to the room, the more I’m sure that this is not my room.
“You come here often?”
“Yes. If I stay long enough, I can put things on the right places. But sometimes it doesn’t really help, though. Sometimes things are just as messed up when I wake up.”
“So this is your dream?”
“Maybe, I’m not sure.”
“I am in your dream. How?”
“I miss you. Too much.”
You smiled. My favorite kind of smile. That curl on your lips and the way you run your hand through your hair. You got up and sat beside me. I moved a bit to the left to give you enough room. I hugged the other pillow, got to the position where I can see your face better.
“What kind of things happen here?”
“Oh, you know, feelings.”
You propped your chin on your palm and moved to find a more comfortable position. It is a signed for me to continue.
“Feelings are sometimes so confusing. They ruin my day, my mood.”
“We can’t really control ourselves.”
“Yes. It’s terrifying.”
“How can stay here help?”
“Well, it’s like escaping for a while. No need to worry about anything.”
You lied beside me now, holding my hand. I feel a lot better. It feels like a hot shower and a cup of hot jasmine tea after a long, cold, tiring day.
“How long can we stay?”
“As long as it needed. Maybe someday we can stay forever, I don’t know.
“Is it okay if I came here everytime you are here? Or do you wanna be alone?
“You can come anytime you like. In fact, I think you should come very often. When you are here, I stay sane. It’s good to have you here because when we wake up, you are out of reach most of the time. Like I said, I miss you. Do you know that missing someone or something can be really torturing?”
“I am sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry for yourself. You are a free, pure soul. I’m just too fragile sometimes.”
“You are one of the strongest girls I know.”
“They said I’m such a spoil child. They said I’m a girly spoil child.”
“You? Girly?”
“I know right. People. What did they say about you?”
You squeezed my hand and it made me smile. You know the problem of being strong is no one ever offers you a hand. I know they have done mean things to you. I know they have said mean things to you. Look at you. Stand still by yourself as I tried to put my confidence in back in the right shape.
“You never know.”
“I know. You seemed strong but actually you can’t handle it all by yourself, honey. Wait, you can. You just don’t know how.”
“Is that how you see me?”
“No. I see you as a fictional character that almost too good to be true. I still can’t believe that you walked to my life. But even someone like you is just a human.”
You shut your eyes tightly. Your chest rise up and down as your breathing heavily. Ah, dear, you are stronger than me, but even the strongest one have their limits.
“Don’t worry, love. We are in ‘my room’.”
“Is this really your room?” Your eyes are still closed.
“Not really.”
You opened your eyes and laughed. The loud, happy, relieve laugh that made my lips curl another smile. You continued with more playful voice,”At least this place is ready for us.”
“I know. This is not the world we know.”
“So we stay?”
“We can, for a while. We can always come back if we left, though.”
“Ah, cool. This is like a plain paper.”
“Exactly. What we do when we have a plain paper?”
“We write the story the way we want to.”

2 komentar:

  1. this is so sweet and romantic. i like it. the story seems personal don't you think? is this about you and your boyfriend? well i like it anyway. keep on the good work :)

    ReplyDelete